


Shoot Me, Cupid (Then Shoot Yourself) {prinxiety}

by TiredPanAndNotAFan (orphan_account)



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Alternate Universe - Magic, Alternate Universe - Soulmates (kinda), Angst, Cupid Roman, Guns, Homophobia, Homophobic Language, Self-Harm, Suicidal Anxiety | Virgil Sanders, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide, Suicide Attempt, wounding
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-11-11
Updated: 2019-11-21
Packaged: 2020-12-31 05:47:00
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,704
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21087734
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/TiredPanAndNotAFan
Summary: WARNINGS: guns, attempted suicide, blood, self-harmVirgil had had enough of it. It was too much. When his father left the gun on the counter after threatening him with it, Virgil had an idea. A very bad idea. He almost goes through with it too, until he sees an arrow sticking out of his chest and a very,verypretty man in front of him.ORVirgil nearly shoots himself in the head, but gets shot in the heart instead. Roman finds a cute boy doing something drastic, and decides to save him.





	1. Guns Blood and Pretty Pink Wings

**Author's Note:**

> this is darker than what I usually go for. I mean I reference self-harm in RSCAH but my heart went Angst Time and gave me this.  
READ THE TAGS FOR WARNINGS  
as always i'm writing this on my school computer so all words that can set their monitoring algorithms off have been censored

Virgil sat shivering in the old, empty parking garage. It was one of the perks of being an inner-city kid, he knew all the empty places no one would be. If he was lucky, people might not even hear the gun go off (Virgil knew that would be impossible, it didn't have a muffler). He could feel the blood from the cuts on his arms soaking into his black hoodie, hot and sticky and smelling like copper, but Virgil couldn't bring himself to care. He let his head rest on the cool concrete wall behind him and scrubbed at his eyes. It had been a long night, he thought, feeling his latest bruises ache.

_"You think I'm gonna let a weak f*ggot like you live in my house? You couldn't fight if you tried, you little sh*t!"_

(Virgil could actually hold his own in a fight, his dad had just gotten drunk the night before and didn't remember beating the sh*t out of him.)

Virgil sighed and let his hand drift to the old gun tucked safely in the waist of his jeans, of course with the safety on. He didn't want to blow off his foot or leg, he might live through it. He carefully pulled it out and sat it in his lap. The cold metal just glinted back at him. It was apparently a "Family Relic," and Virgil's dad had kept it in top condition, ready to be used at any time. He wasn't a registered gun owner, and getting a replacement would require that. The gun was Virgil's dad's favorite thing, more than food, more than life, more than Virgil...

It was the gun that killed his mom. When he was four when his dad got tired of her. She was washing the dishes when he grabbed the gun off the mantle, turned off the safety, and shot her in the back. Virgil had started crying, so his dad put him in the closet, piled blankets on top of him, and duct-taped the door closed. He had quickly learned to not cry around his father. The gun was a common threat, his dad would always say things like "If I hear your phone one more time I'll put a bullet in it" or "Say that one more time and I'll shoot you in the head." Virgil had actually gotten used to it, along with the beatings and the drinking, but tonight was new, different from any time before. Virgil closed his eyes and let the memory wash over him.

_Virgil cowered, or as best he could with his hands and ankles tied to the chair. The ropes rubbed at his scars, and the splintery chair scraped at his bare back. His dad was somewhere behind him, but he didn't know where. His head was already foggy from the pain. The blood from his split lip was warm and wet, his ribs aching and sore. He heard his dad shuffling behind his and tensed to be hit. A sharp pain to the back of his head made Virgil cry out, slumping forward. Black creeped at the edge of his vision. If he could pass out, it would be over with sooner--_

_Virgil was quickly brought back with a gasp as freezing cold water splashed on his head. It dripped into his eyes and ran in frigid fingers down his back. His dad stepped in front of him, holding the gun, sneering with contempt. He leaned forward and waved the gun in Virgil's face. His breath smelled like alcohol._

_"You think you can come into my house after the stunt you pulled, you little queer? Huh? Did he make you scream? Is your *ss raw? Bet you liked it, huh?" _

_Virgil's eyes flew wide open. Is that what his dad thought he was doing? Hadn't he told his dad he had detention all week? Apparently his drunk father misinterpreted Virgil's expression._

_"You thought I didn't know, huh? Your mom was just like this, cheap tramp. Good thing I killed her," he leered, making Virgil flinch back. "Maybe I should kill you, too. Solve all my problems with one bullet!" Virgil squeezed his eyes shut and waited. His pain-addled brain reasoned that it would be over sooner if he didn't fight._

_But the bullet never came._

_After a minute, he tentatively opened his eyes. He was met with his dad staring at him thoughtfully--which was never good._

_"I'm gonna untie you, and leave the gun on the table. Take it and blow your brains out somewhere quiet. If you're still here when I wake up tomorrow, I'll shoot you, and if they don't find your body by next Saturday, I'll track you down and give you to some f*ggot who wants a s*x doll. Got it, sh*thead?" Virgil whimpered and nodded, and his dad punched him hard in the gut. As Virgil doubled over in pain, his dad undid the ropes. He didn't dare move until his dad disappeared into his room._

_Virgil had to go, quick. Ge snatched the gun off the table and stuffed it in the waist of his jeans, pulling on the ripped t-shirt beside it. Ash he rushed into his room to grab his jacket and his favorite pocket knife, he came up with a plan._

Virgil ran his hands over the gun. He hated it with all his being. It was only right that something he hated was going to be the death of him. Shakily, he clicked off the safety and made sure it was loaded (as he had done at least eight times in the last hour). He raised it to his head, finger on the trigger, reaffirming his grip, closed hie eyes, started to squeeze on the handle...

The gun clattered to the ground. Virgil had dropped it in surprise-- all of a sudden, he felt the most beautiful, gut-wrenching things, feelings he barely even knew the names of. His eyes flew open, and there, before him was the most beautiful man Virgil had ever seen.

He had skin the color of Terra-Cotta, broad shoulders and muscled arms, flame-red hair and piercing green eyes. He was draped in what looked like a light pink toga, and wings folded behind his back. a quiver stuck over his shoulder, with one hand he was holding a bow, and the other...

The other had thrust an arrow into his own heart.

The arrow had a shining thread attached to it, leading toward Virgil. He looked down and saw an arrow sticking out of his chest, ethereal and rose-gold.

Virgil fainted.

\---

"Hey-- hey! are you awake!? Oh, please wake up, you can't be dead! Oh, Venus, what do I do!?" Virgil awoke slowly, his eyes drifting open. His forearms stung from his not treating the cuts and his back was sore from the concrete. He hadn't been moved, but he could clearly see that it was day instead of night. He felt lightheaded from the blood loss and pain made white creep at the edge of his vision. The pretty man with the wings paced in front of him, oblivious to Virgil's consciousness. He had not stopped rambling, his voice was smooth and melodic despite being strained with worry. "Aphrodite give me strength, he can see me, he was going to shoot himself, what will I do, oh Eros, dear Bas, help me--"

"Uh, hey," Virgil croaked, making the man jump, stumble and fall. His wings shot out--they were pink--as he landed hard on the ground with an _oof._

"Tu Er Shen, you scared me! You're awake! How are you, are you alright!?" Virgil nodded and the man smiled. "Wonderful! I'm Roman! I saved you!"

"I didn't want to be saved." Roman's face crumpled, and he shrunk in on himself.

"I was just trying to help," he whimpered, making Virgil instantly feel bad. He tried to scoot closer to Roman, but his hand landed on the gun.

"You... you did, I think... Uh, thanks?"

"Oh, you're welcome, it was but a small feat!"

"Dude, the bags under your eyes rival _mine_ and you fell over at practically nothing, I don't really think that's small." The man flinched, his wings fluffing up.

"I was saving a life, it was nothing..."

"Yeah, but what the f*ck did you do?"

"Well, uhm, we'll just say that Cupids are not meant to be Paired?" Roman grinned sheepishly and Virgil narrowed his eyes in confusion.

"Dude, I think I've lost a lot of blood and I'm stupid right now, you're gonna have to put that in layman's terms."

"Well, I'm a celestial match-making being called a Cupid and I've Paired myself with you so that you wouldn't blow your brains out. Ta-da, I'm your new soulmate?" Roman made Jazz hands, and Virgil groaned. The cupid's face fell as he watched Virgil push up his sleeves. "Oh Albinia, that is a lot of blood, do you humans usually bleed that much?" Bandages appeared in Roman's hand (Virgil was still too out of it to be surprised) and he started wrapping up Virgil's arm. Once he got done, the suicidal emo passed out again.


	2. Not An Actual Chapter, Don't Get Excited

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> pls read

Hey dudebros

Sam here

I uh

don't feel like writing any of my Sanders Sides stuff rn. I just cant find any inspiration to

(also i dont have the plots for many of them planned out as much as id like. If you want to go read them and suggest things that I should do that would be awesome)

If you want more of my content, you can just like

go to my stuff. read it

its always welcome

If you're mad at me, go read:

[Sanders Behavioral Health (by AstroZone)](https://archiveofourown.org/works/21140099/chapters/50310749)

[Waste Away (by NicoAndTheNineGalaxies)](https://archiveofourown.org/works/19759093/chapters/46771336)

[Stray Hearts Are Subject To Change (by Queen_Whovian_and_Everything_Else555)](https://archiveofourown.org/works/21366088/chapters/50893813)

because they're awesome and i love them

While yall may be disappointed on my lack of Sanders Sides stuff, if you're into Beetlejuice, you'll be happy to know that I WILL be updating by two Beetlejuice fics,[_ Inside Out And Upside Down_](https://archiveofourown.org/works/21422743/chapters/51041941) and [_Pretty Things Don't Play In The Dark_](https://archiveofourown.org/works/21332851/chapters/50806951)

<strike>Also i MIGHT update April Fool's but that's only because it's my main SS project</strike>

Thanks for understanding!!!!!


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